In many cultures, the tradition of doulas—those who support individuals through significant life transitions—has existed for hundreds of years. These practices, often erased by colonial histories, are now re-emerging in new forms, such as gender doulas, to meet the needs of transgender and gender diverse (TGD) individuals. Gender doulas provide compassionate, holistic support for those navigating their gender identity, combining the wisdom of ancient caregiving traditions with the lived experiences of modern TGD communities.
This resurgence reflects a broader movement towards recognizing the importance of emotional, social, and practical support for people exploring their gender identity. Eli Lawliet, Ph.D., known as The Gender Doula, explains, “The Gender Doula was born when I heard Erica Livingston, a full-spectrum birth doula, on a podcast. Erica said that there should be a doula for every threshold of life, and it felt like I had been struck by a bolt of lightning.”
From this inspiration, Eli found his path, recognizing that people exploring gender identity deserve the same depth of care and guidance that traditional doulas provide for childbirth and other life transitions. Eli’s work is rooted in the belief that everyone’s gender journey is unique, and that supporting individuals in their self-discovery is an ancient, sacred practice.
Gender Doula Services: What They Offer
Both Eli Lawliet and fellow gender doula Rainbow Winnike, MSW (they/them), offer a variety of services tailored to meet each person’s needs. These services are grounded in empathy, self-acceptance, and practical support, including:
- Exploring Gender Identity: A nonjudgmental space to question, explore, and affirm one’s gender identity.
- Coming Out Strategies: Practical guidance on coming out to family, friends, and colleagues, with tailored approaches for different situations.
- Navigating Social Environments: Helping clients build confidence and strategies to navigate public spaces or challenging social settings.
- Transition Planning: Whether the goal is medical, social, or legal transition, gender doulas help clients map out a path that aligns with their personal goals and needs.
For Eli and Rainbow, the role of a gender doula is to meet people where they are, providing affirmation and practical guidance through their gender journey.
Rainbow Winnike: A Journey of Self-Acceptance and Community Care
Rainbow Winnike, MSW, who also goes by Bowie, brings a unique perspective to gender doula work, informed by their own life journey. Bowie identifies as trans, nonbinary, queer, and neurodivergent, having navigated a path from a conservative Catholic upbringing to their current identity as an animistic witch and community healer.
Bowie’s background includes a master’s degree in Social Work from Gallaudet University, a Deaf university where they learned about disability justice. Their professional experience spans roles as an art teacher, ASL interpreter, sex educator, and mental health provider, with a focus on supporting 2SLGBTQIA+ individuals and survivors of domestic violence.
Throughout this journey, Bowie found themselves becoming a trusted guide for community members exploring their gender and neurodivergence. As they describe it, “I would naturally find myself in conversations where people shared things they had never told anyone before. It felt affirming to know that my life experience could help someone else know they are not alone.”
Today, Bowie leads Rainbow Chrysalis Coaching, where they work with NeuroQueer clients—individuals who are both neurodivergent and queer—helping them uncover their power and gently come back to themselves. Bowie’s work reflects a deep commitment to providing intersectional care that honors the complexity of identity and self-discovery.
Why Gender Doulas Matter
The need for gender doulas is more pressing than ever. As more people embrace their gender diversity, they encounter both joy and challenges. Traditional medical and mental health systems may not always provide the comprehensive, affirming care that TGD individuals deserve. Gender doulas like Eli and Rainbow step into this gap, offering personalized, culturally sensitive support that aligns with the individual’s unique path.
Organizations such as WPATH and clinical guidelines emphasize the importance of holistic care for transgender and gender diverse people, acknowledging the importance of emotional and social support alongside medical interventions. Gender doulas are not a replacement for mental health professionals or medical providers, but rather complementary guides who support clients in navigating all aspects of their gender journey.
A Growing Movement
Eli Lawliet and Rainbow Winnike are at the forefront of a growing movement to expand the role of doulas to encompass the full spectrum of human experience. This work honors the traditions of care that predate colonial systems and affirms the need for more community-based, holistic support systems today. Their work is not just about helping individuals transition, but about creating a world where TGD people are seen, supported, and empowered in all aspects of their lives.
If you’re seeking support in your gender journey, you can learn more from these compassionate practitioners:
- Eli Lawliet, Ph.D. (he/him), The Gender Doula
- Rainbow Winnike, MSW (they/them): Rainbow Chrysalis Coaching
In reclaiming the ancient tradition of doulas for the modern gender journey, Eli and Bowie offer TGD individuals a path to self-discovery, healing, and affirmation, reminding us that no one has to walk this path alone.
